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Thursday, 25 December 2014

My Thank You List for 2014

Well, I have not really put a lot of effort into this blog bar putting up some of the poems I have written up so I decided with 2015 knocking on the door I would try and put a little more up on here.
So with my first attempt, I thought I would just thank the people that have been involved in my life this year.

The first group I want to thank is my family, collectively we have had a lot of tough times this year, but together we have got through everything as it hit us and we are all still here.
This year has shown me that through thick and thin your family will always to be there to love and support you regardless of the situations you find yourself (Or in some cases get yourself) in.
I can honestly admit that while I know that I am always willing to help and be there for my family, I never appreciated how powerful and meaningful it is to have the support of the people we call family.
I want to thank everyone in my family for everything you have done for me, I am truly grateful for all of you and can honestly tell you that I would not be the person I am today without your support.

The second group to thank is my friends.
Thank you to all my friends both old and new, I have met some great people in my life that have supported me with all the stuff I have gone through this year it really means a lot to me to have all of you here with me on my journey.
I am quite a shy person, to begin with, and keep a lot to myself as a way to protect me and thank you to everyone who has stuck around with me until I get comfortable enough to be who I honestly am.
 On that note thank you to all of you who stuck with me after finding out what an oddball I actually am.
They say that you can tell who a person actually is by the people they surround themselves with and I think that I could not have a better group of people to call my friends.
I am so grateful for all of you and cannot begin to explain the impact you have all had on my life, and I will always aim to be the best possible friend I can be to all of you.

The last person I want to thank is my ex.
I wish things between us now were different and I could still call you my best friend but hopefully in time maybe one day we can be friends again.
I want to thank you for all the times we had together, I truly loved all the memories we made both big and small.
I’m not sure if you know, but I have never opened up to anyone like I opened up to you, I showed you the real me both good and bad.
I wish I could go back and change some of the things I did as I know I wasn't always the best person to you.
I had/have a habit of wanting or needing to be right all the time, and if I can take anything away from what I have learnt this year, it is that I am not always right.
I can’t force my point of view onto others as it is only my opinion and everyone else has the right to convey their own views on life.
I want you to know part of me will always love and care for you, and I am so happy and proud to say that I had you in my life.
You are a fantastic person that is so full of life, and I hope that all your wishes and goals in life come true.
I know the odds of you ever seeing or reading this is slim to none but I would like you to know that I truly appreciate everything we had and everything that you did for me and everything I have learnt from you.

This is all I have for this post, and I hope that if anyone actually reads this that they stop and take stock of the journey they call their life and thank the people that help us on the paths we walk.



Standing here staring at you
I’m feeling so numb
I cannot explain why I feel the way I do
This way I feel about you

I never stop thinking about you
You invade my every thought and dream
Looking beautiful as always
Just the thought of you makes me smile

I know we will only be friends
And I must brush this off and move on
But in my dreams things are different
The way I want them to be

Your smile gets me through the hardest times
Your eyes light my world when it is at its darkest
Your very presence helps me be a better person

The person I want to be, the person with you

(Written 2005)

Im Sorry

I’m Sorry

I sit here, my life fading away
Memories spilling to the floor with my blood
As darkness devours me, I think of you
I’m Sorry

I wish I had been honest
Treated you with respect
I should have just confessed
I’m Sorry

My life went so dark the day I lost you
And I have only myself to blame
My life was just one big lie
I’m Sorry

As I sit here with this blade in my hand
I try to talk myself out of this
But the darkness has consumed me entirely
I’m Sorry

(Written 2004)